GOOD AND EVIL THESAURI

How many of you have noticed the feebleness of Microsoft Word’s thesaurus? Raise your hands!  Have you noticed that sometimes it even gives the wrong synonyms for the word selected? How bad is that? Don’t these geeks understand how important the right word is to writers? That words are to us what gigabytes are to them?  If writers were more organized, we’d have gathered together to stone the geeks responsible by now.

In Googling Microsoft Word Thesaurus to see if anyone else has discovered the idiocy of this electronic garbage, I ran across Pete Moore’s paean to Roget’s Fourth, my personal favorite, at http://www.absolutewrite.com/fun/thesauri.htm.  It’s not only a hilarious column (try Roget for translating the Gettysburg address sometime), but it verifies that Microsoft has deliberately CENSORED the thesaurus. Not just messed up the definitions but eliminated entire words because THEY thought they were inappropriate, words like “idiot” for instance.  How dare they?  Did they think school kids would spend their day sending each other notes with more intelligent substitutions for idiot?

And even knowing how bad Word’s thesaurus is, I still automatically click to it when the word I want eludes me, because that one click is so much simpler than diving into my beloved Roget’s.  I may go directly to Roget when I can’t remember the name for the part of a ship that I need, or a color I want, or all the other fascinating things that I can find once I start playing in wonderland, because nothing electronic can replace a book.  Just the index can remind me of the word I need, which is what Word ought to do and doesn’t. But sometimes, when I need that elusive perfect word, I sink into Roget, and I’m lucky to come out of my trance in ten or fifteen minutes. Which is why I keep going back to that danged one click. Time is precious. 

So I’m tickled to have discovered a new trick, www.thesaurus.com.  I’ve only been playing with it  a week or so, but it’s been absolutely fabulous in helping me find better words than the overworked ones I have in my revised manuscript.  There are only so many ways one can say “superhuman power” before it gets old, especially if I’m writing about the 18th century when there weren’t any scientific terms for telekinesis or the like.  This on-line thesaurus comes directly from my beloved Roget’s, gives me antonyms and related words along with the synonyms, and all by simply typing in a word. I keep it open at the bottom of my screen and click on it whenever I need inspiration.  I think I’m in love all over again.

Do you have any thesaurus stories? MS Word stories?

And just because I'm so tickled to have real bookshelves again, I'm including a photo of the partially completed ones my husband is building for me. And I'm supposed to remind you that  I'm blogging daily on my progress from  idea through proposal to ...hopefully...sale, along with rants on writing life, at  www.patriciarice.blogspot.com.  And also about  www.feedblitz.com which can feed blogs directly into your mailbox.  I'm actually reading blogs regularly now!  When you hit the site, realize "subscription"  means sign up for a blog. (So, I'm a dolt. )

Comments

[Margaret]

What a lovely, inviting room it is, Patricia. The bookshelves are gorgeous and you are one lucky duck to have such a talented husband. Gosh, you don't even have to fantasize playing Handyman/Homemaker. You can have it for real.

The light coming into the room is yummy. I am envious.

[Maggie Robinson]

I just get a kick out of the underlined "wrong" words when I write. The suggestions from Word are usually absolutely hilarious. And thank goodness I just finished out how to turn off underlining fragments...altho I can't quite remember anymore...because apparently I am a very fragmented person. I actually have an aged Roget's that belonged to my second cousin, who wrote a fashion column for the New Yorker (unfortunately her writing and fashion style was not inherited). The book smells musty and the glue is gone, but I still use it!

[Gina Black]

Have you checked out the visual thesaurus? http://www.visualthesaurus.com It's fabulous. It is a subscription site (and I have subscribed) but you can get a few words here and there for free. Just enough to get a habit going . . .

[kay]

Microsoft Word! AAAKK! Dear Mr. Gates: We can think for ourselves. When we want a 2. following a 1. we will put it there. And please do not change what I put in a header, because when I put it in the header I wanted it there. And, does anybody else have problems finding verbs in Microsoft word thesaurus? If I put the words "Microsoft Word" in the thesaurus I bet the word "headache" would be one of my choices.

[NinaP]

Hey Pat!

I'm with you on Words less than stellar thesaurus. I use it too, but I always end up at thesaurus.com.

Here's a question. Do you know of any place (preferably online) where you can type in an idiom and get suggestions for "older" sayings that mean the same thing? For example: "on the lam" is primarily an American saying. (don't know how old it is) What jargon/slang would a Regency gentleman use that meant the same thing?

BTW, to anyone who hasn’t checked out Pat’s blog… do. It’s an honest look at a writer’s trials and triumphs in the daily pursuit of craft. Very educational and uplifting.

[AgTigress]

I know just what you mean. The Word thesaurus IS rubbish, but it is so convenient...

Thesaurus com. is good, and is always just one click away when one happens to be posting on Delphi's Dictionary Com. forum, as I do far too much. The dictionary there is very handy, too (a compilation of entries from various dictionaries), but one needs to note that it is American. British writers are usually aware that much more than the spelling divides British and American English (not to mention Australian, NZ, Canadian, South African, Irish, Hong Kong, Indian and countless other Englishes).

I don't think that American writers whose work is also published in other English-speaking countries are always quite as conscious of the fact that the dialects differ. Because connotations of words may not be the same, the mot juste in one's own dialect may be better replaced by something a little less precise.

Consider the word 'quaint'. It now has quite derogatory connotations in BE, but is apparently still quite neutral or even positive in AE. Not many people know that...

;-)

[RfP]

Merriam-Webster has a good dictionary and fair thesaurus online (free):
http://www.m-w.com

Though for me, it serves a different function from the M-W print editions. I love the way the printed M-W New International and New Collegiate editions draw on historical/literary examples to amplify the etymology.

[Michelle Butler]

My favorite thesaurus is The Synonym Finder. I've never gotten into Roget's.

-Michelle

[Patricia Rice]

Isn't the light in that room scrumptious? The windows are one of the reasons we bought this house.

Don't get me started on Word's grammar and spelling! Those squiggly lines are the first things I turn off on a new computer. If they change the menu on me, I hunt them down with a vengeance.

I've heard of the visual dictionary but I'm terribly afraid it's another time sink, so I've avoided trying it. If I can spend 15 minutes with a book, what would happen on an interactive website? I may never write again!

FWIW, for idioms, try http://idioms.thefreedictionary.com/
It's not the be-all or end-all but it might jog your imagination. I have a stack of references with various slang and idiom usages, but have never found a truly comprehensive one.

Ag, as historical writers, we're often painfully aware of the changing connotations of words, British, English, et al. I frankly write for an American audience, in the contemps and the historicals, and assume I'd have to have a "translator" to watch out for unfortunate usage outside the States, especially in the contemps. I've read British writers all my life and have learned a great deal about the differences, but the language changes quickly these days. Sounds like your "quaint" may be going the way of our "interesting" when you used in the proper context. "G"

I'm off to play with all these new websites. Thank you! (and anyone up for organizing a Microsoft stoning, keep me in mind! Maybe we could all just email them an incorrect word a day?)

[kay]

This website has links to tons of English/Irish/American slang. I don't know about historical website slang, but there is even a Yorkshire Dialect Society listed.

http://www.peevish.co.uk/slang/links.htm

[maryjoputney]

To be honest, I wouldn't even know here to find the MS thesaurus, but I'm sure I'd also hate it if I tried. Like Michelle, I like Rodale's THE SYNONYM FINDER. It works just like a dictionary: look up the word alphabetically, and there are all those nice synonyms, grouped according to the different meanings of the word. Roget's irritates me and never did as good a job at helping me find words.

Mary Jo, who has two copies of The Synonym Finder so she won't be in trouble when the first one falls apart.

[Jane George]

The Online Etymology Dictionary can be a useful first go-to spot for the origins of words and phrases. It can also be a bit frustrating, but then there's always the OED and that &#@* magnifying glass. (Hmm, I just realized Online Etymology has the same acronym...)

I'm currently "diving into" Mystic Guardian and am enjoying the risks you've taken with the world of Aelynn. (The sponge chair, contrasting the governments of Aelynn and right-before-the-revolution France, and the differing mating/marriage values for instance) As you're most probably working on another Guardian story, I hope Nevan is in there somewhere. He's intriguing.

The paranormal words I have the most trouble replacing are "power" and "energy."

Thanks for the most excellent links, guys!

[Patricia Rice]

Oh, Kay, what a wonderful time sink to play with, thank you! Mary Jo, you're a Luddite. MS Thesaurus can be accessed by clicking on the word and rightclicking your mouse and clicking thesaurus. So simple. So irritating. The Synonym Finder is too simple. It's the fascinating way Roget compares so many different words in so many different ways---along with all those great lists---that keeps me hooked.

Thanks Jane, I'm glad you're getting the contrast. The tough part is trying to keep it simple enough for someone who isn't interested in the layers. "G" I agree, "power" and "energy" are way overworked. I should have invented some new words, but then my editor would weep quietly into her beer, and I try to be kind to her.

[RfP]

Oh, my. Here's an online dictionary aggregator--it claims "10,009,994 words in 942 dictionaries indexed"

http://www.onelook.com/

OneLook includes the Lexical Free Net, which gives synonyms and relationships between similar words. It's pretty interesting:

http://www.lexfn.com/

[Jane George]

LOL on the tears and beer.

I've just met Iosan, an interesting, er NO, I mean fascinating character! I'm a sucker for the soulful, tortured types, so I'm just sure he'll get his own story eventually.

[Sherrie Holmes]

Years ago some wiseacre at Microsoft planted a funny in the thesaurus. In Windows 95, if you typed the phrase "I'd like to get naked" and then highlighted it and used the MS thesaurus, you'd get this response: "I'll drink to that." This isn't an urban legend, either. I used to show it to friends and co-workers for a laugh.

I'm probably the only living soul in the world who likes Microsoft and gets along well with it.

[Patricia Rice]

Ah, Jane, I have you hooked now. "G" If you think Iason is tortured, wait until you meet Murdoch. I'm having so much fun with these guys!

Sherrie, there were other geeky things implanted in various MS Word programs, although my holey memory won't recall them. I can get along with Microsoft, but it has the potential for so much more that I only shake my head in despair.

[Jane O]

What lovely websites you all are providing! I'm going to have to start breaking down my bookmarks a bit more so I can find things.
The Microsoft Thesaurus is truly ridiculous (inane, inadequate, foolish, etc.), but so is the grammar check. Curiously enough, I have been known to use the passive voice because I WANT to use the passive voice. And having a squiggly red line appear every time I make a typo drives me crazy. (I make lots of typos. I prefer to go back and correct them when I have finished my thought.) So I have all that stuff turned off.
I liked Microsoft Word 4 for the Mac, before all the bells and whistles. A case where more is definitely less. Unfortunately, Word 4 is as dead as my old Mac SE.

[Jo Beverley]

Even though XY Write (the DOS wordprocessor I write with) has a thesaurus, I haven't got into the habit of using it. If I'm stuck for the right word, it's more useful and stimulating to pull down the thesaurus and browse a bit.

It lives with my more frequently used books right by my hand, though I try to avoid breaking the flow by opening any of them. Perhaps I'll blog on Friday about the books on those shelves....

But okay, if I used Word maybe I'd get used to it, but its interactivity -- to give it a kind word -- drives me nuts when I have to use it. It flags things, it jiggles as it adjusts lines, it's a pest. Though I wonder if it's able to flag in different languages. That would be useful for some, wouldn't it? If one could switch on UK check and it'd query cent, quit, and vest? Or switch on Australian and have it do similar. UK writers could do the same in reverse, because I've spotted errors that way, too, and I've become so bilingual I sometimes mess up.

Argh, I'm enabling the Evil Empire!

XY Write just puts what I type on the screen, pale gray on black, every spelling error and grammatical variation unheeded unless I tell it otherwise, and that's how I like it.

Jo :)

[Jane George]

Murdoch, stripped of his powers, exiled, wandering strife-ridden France... you're right, I'm so there!

For anyone who hasn't yet cracked open Mystic Guardian, it's a treat.

[Marie]

Try wordsweb. It works even when internet is not connected. It gives you similar, antonyms, and other ways to find the perfect word. Best of all its free.

[Patricia Rice]

Oh, Marie, you evil temptress! I just downloaded the free version of wordweb. If it's as lovely as it looks, you may never see me again. I'll be hooked on the pro version and wandering the internet, never to be seen again. Evil, I say!

Jo, my Roget and my dictionary are at my right hand. Since my office area is crowded, I only keep select volumes on the shelf near my feet and everything else is sent to the dungeon.

I'm currently writing Murdoch's story, Jane. But you can't have him until 2009!

[Sergei Andropov]

"Years ago some wiseacre at Microsoft planted a funny in the thesaurus."

Unfortunately, they also put in a lot of seriously unfunny stuff, like calls for violence against gays and Jews. I don't remember any of them word for word, but even if I did, they're too offensive to post. In any case, they seem to have since scrubbed the program.

I do remember one of the non-hateful ones, though. If you typed in something like "I think Microsoft should rule the world", it would respond the same way it did to "I'd like to get naked."