It's Sunday.
It's me, Edith.
And it will be the best of times or the worst of times today. At least, for me. I'm going to a book signing at a huge Barnes & Noble Superstore here on Long Island today.
Are you an egotist? A bad signing will cure you forever. People shopping for books, passing you and avoiding your eye for fear you'll try to sell them something, or stopping to ask you where the lady's room is. A bad signing can make you think of abandoning writing and taking up clamming for a living.
Are you feeling low? A good signing will make you feel like Queen of the World! So many people who love your books! (note: good signings are rare.)
I love to get together with other authors and compare signing stories.
Do any other authors have one? Do any readers have any?
The best I ever heard was one my son-in-law, a Brit, told me. It's a little Monty Python, but it's true. When he was a student he got a job in a bookstore. They had an author in to do a signing, and as often happens, nobody came. The author was downcast, the manager of the bookshop, upset.
So he hit upon a plan. He had all his salespersons leave their posts, and one by one go to the author and ask for an autograph. Then the manager had his workers come back to the author after exchanging hats and coats, as well as altering their postures so as to appear taller or shorter. The overwhelmed author was frabjous, and hardly had time to look up from his signing as he was besieged by all these avid fans.
My son-in-law wore three different outfits that day. But that was one happy author!
Hoorah for understanding booksellers!
Well, here I go.... Wish me a good bookstore.
(Uh, and to cover my ego, I'm signing with Barbara Metzger and Joan Wolf. We can blame each other if no one shows.)